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Spiritual LeaderBecome the Spiritual Leader in Your HomeMarriage is in turmoil in our great country, and Christians are leading the pack. Marriage is embattled from all sides. The media attacks men and women with unorthodox stereotypes. Men and women reversing roles, children taking on the role of parents while human intimacy and sexuality are routinely degraded to be nothing more than public entertainment. Our educational system has taken up sides with Hollywood along with much of the elite, politicians, sociologists, all fueled by the media and our own passion for self. I believe the number one reason for the failure of marriage, especially in the Christian home is the husband’s lack of spiritual leadership. When I bring up the idea of men being spiritual leaders in their homes I never get outright protest, actually I almost never get any response. Men and single moms, do not know what a spiritual leader is. Before I get into what spiritual leadership is all about, let me first address the role of men in a marriage. This is a subject that is misunderstood by men and especially in the Church. The first mention of a mans role is found early on in Genesis when the Lord gave Adam his first responsibility, Genesis 2:15 Then the LORD God took the man and put him into the garden of Eden to cultivate it and keep it. Next he gave Adams the rules, 16 And the LORD God commanded the man, saying, "From any tree of the garden you may eat freely; 17 but from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil you shall not eat, for in the day that you eat from it you shall surely die." Two important conclusions; it was man that was given the responsibility of provider, not the women; man was given the rules to keep, not the women. The very next thing that happened was the creation of Eve, as a helper. Someone to come alongside Adam and help him, not take on the responsibility of support, not to be responsible to set and keep the rules, but to support him as a helper; Genesis 2:18 ¶ Then the LORD God said, "It is not good for the man to be alone; I will make him a helper suitable for him." The Apostle Paul gives us insights and the foundational understanding of what a mans role is in marriage when he compares the relationships in marriage to the relationship Christ has with His bride the Church; Ephesians 5:32 This mystery is great; but I am speaking with reference to Christ and the church. Men, we are to treat our wives like Christ treated the church, giving His very life to sanctify her in righteousness, to atone for her through His own blood. So what should the role of a man be in light of scripture? What must a man do to be a spiritual leader? To be a spiritual leader you would: Be the provider - Men do not allow your wife to be lowered to your level, Christ provided everything His bride needs, she is not expected to provide her own way, He provided for her. Be the rule maker - Take on the responsibility to establish and maintain the rules; do not force your sweetheart into the role of lawmaker, lawgiver and enforcer. Be the one responsible - Be responsible by making the final decision. Why would you allow your wife to take on the responsibility of bad decision-making? You should be the final say; you should take on the responsibility for all that goes wrong, just like Christ did on the cross. If you will practice just these three simple principles your family and especially your marriage will blossom. Your sweetheart will feel cared for, she might have to give up some of the nice things a second income provides, but the investment the two of you will make in your children will far outweigh any material benefits you might bestow on your children. The home she will make for you will excite your heart for her. Taking responsibility for decisions will build trust in you as the spiritual leader in your home. Now, I have one last comment on the roles of men and women. This is about putting your wife on a pedestal, giving up self for her. It is about making her priorities your priorities; it is about women turning over responsibility of the final decision making to their husbands. Men, it is not about becoming a tyrant. Women, it is about trusting God to turn your man into the spiritual leader God wants him to become, not the one you design. Following these simple principles will turn a man into a dynamic leader and his wife into a princess. |
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